~~ The Beauty of Hope ~~

Hope. A word so powerful that it can mean the difference between life and death. Without hope there is no reason to go on, no reason to try, and no reason to believe that there's anything worth holding on to. Without hope our life is but a passing wind... a flower that withers away into nothingness. Our lives have no passion, no direction, no purpose if we don't have hope. But where can this hope be found?

For those of us who have come to know the Lord on a deeply personal level, our joy in Him overflows! We bow our hearts in prayer, meditate on His Word day and night, and see Creation as His divine artwork. We smile as we watch the rain fall from the sky and remember His promise when we see the rainbow that follows the storm. In these things we find hope. Although life has it's troubles, and some may seem unbearable, at the end of the day we have the assurance of Eternity to hold on to. Our hope is found in Salvation and "nothing can separate us from the love of God that is found in Christ Jesus." (Romans 8:38 & 39).

But what about the broken? What about the souls so deperately in need of a Savior? What about those who would give anything to hear the message of Salvation? Oh, if only we'd look past the outer appearance. The Holy Word tells us that "man looks at the outer appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." (1 Samuel 16:7) I long for His Eternal perspective.

How convicted I was this morning as I listened to "Does Anybody Hear Her?" by Casting Crowns. How many times throughout my life have I walked past another and been completely disgusted at their lifestyle? How many times have I chosen not to speak to someone new at church because of the way they were dressed or how they spoke? It breaks my heart as I consider how many people never came back because they felt so judged and alone. If only I would have reached out...

Forgive me, Lord, for forgetting that Your desire is that none should perish. Forgive me, Lord, for overlooking the very hearts you have brought into my life to touch. Lord, give me Your eyes so I can see the tears behind the smile. Give me Your ears so I can hear the silent cries of the broken. Give me Your touch so I can reach out to the lost. And give me Your heart, Lord, so I can love the unlovable.

But is there hope for us to change? Is there even a chance that we will leave behind the pedistal we've built for ourselves and choose instead to seek the lost? And when we find them, how do we convince them of the hope that is found in Christ alone? What if they reject us? What shall we do then?

"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer." ~Romans 12:12

And what shall we do then, Lord? Where will you lead us and for how long must we endure the rejection of the world?

"And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom He has given us." ~Romans 5:2b-5

But what if we see no results? What if we keep praying, keep hoping, keep perservering and still cannot see if we are making a difference?

"For faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." ~Hebrews 11:1

Oh Lord, at times I grow so weary of resisting the enemy. My human body limits me... my spirit is willing but my flesh is weak. Where can I find the strength to go on when my flesh refuses the journey?

"But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." ~Isaiah 40:31

I see it clearly now, Lord. Your desire is that I should plant seeds, but it's up to you to water them and make them grow.

"Other men see only a hopeless end, but the Christian rejoices in an endless hope."

~ Gilbert M. Beeken

Give Me Your Eyes

How bittersweet it is when I find a touching song. My heart breaks, my soul longs for more, and my spirit feels a contentedness in nothing but the arms of my Savior. No matter how much we love another, it never compares to the perfect love that God has for us. Not just His children, but the blind and the broken of this world as well. His impartiality is amazing and I wonder if I will ever understand it.







Do you ever sit in a coffee shop, take a walk in the park, or stand in line at the airport and take a moment to look at the people around you? Not just a glance, but a peering into the soul? I'm brought to tears nearly every day as the Lord allows me to look into the heart of perfect strangers. I never fail to be touched beyond words as the struggles, the fears, and the dreams of another flash before my eyes. It's like watching a silent film with the actors sitting beside you tell you each thought and feeling they had during that part of the movie.


A washing came over me this morning as I spent my quiet time with the Lord. I awoke with a burdened heart and I knew instantly what the cause of it was. Sometimes it's a guessing game and it takes much prayer to determine the cause. This morning, however, the answer was clear as crystal.


Falling down on my face as my eyes filled with tears, I asked the Lord to forgive me for my selfcenteredness. How I waste my time trying to make things work out my way instead of allowing God to lead my every step. It is a constant battle and I often wonder if I tire the Lord with my stubborness. If I know that God's plans are better than my own, why do I keep pressing to do things my way? My plans fall short and I always end up wishing I had done things His way.

I ran across a song today that reminded me how much the Lord has changed my view of people. I used to look at them with no empathy and with little consideration about anything besides what was happening in my life at that time. Over time and the closer I have grown to God the more the way I see the world has changed. He has healed my vision so that I now see others and life's situations through His eyes. Although I now stand at the crossroad of life I stand without fear for, although the way is unclear to my human eyes, I find comfort in knowing that the Holy Spirit will show me the way.

Dare to trust the Lord in all things. It's worth the sacrifice. It's worth the journey. It's worth the search and worth the praying. It's worth everything.

Take a look at the people around you. The Lord has caused each of them to cross your path for a specific reason. Where your instincts are to judge, choose instead to pray. Where your instincts are to be angry, choose instead to smile. Where your insticts are to ignore, choose instead to reach out. Where your instincts are to hurt, choose instead to be kind. Where your human nature tells you to retaliate, choose instead to love. And where your flesh tells you to turn a blind eye to the pain around you, choose instead to see.

Give me Your eyes for just one second

Give me Your eyes so I can see

Everything that I've been missing

Give me Your love for humanity

Give me Your arms for the broken hearted

Ones that are far beyond my reach

Give me Your heart for the ones forgotten

Give me Your eyes so I can see

Father, give me a heart like yours.

*********************************

Brandon Heath - Give Me Your Eyes <~~ Be Touched

The Greatest Question Ever Asked

If you're anything like me you probably get a kick out of the hilarious questions that seem to find their way out of a child's mouth. I myself find it hard to keep from laughing when I hear some of the thoughts that swim around in their little heads. I've had to work at keeping a straight face when such questions arise because, if you haven't noticed, kids take their questions and your answers to those questions very seriously.






Who among us hasn't, at one time or another, been asked the age old question "Why is the sky blue?" or, better yet, "Where do babies come from?" Although there is only one answer to each of these questions, you will find that rarely is the true answer ever articulated. In fact, it's become the norm to respond with a false answer. Here are some typical responses a child receives in regards to the second question:

While I'll admit that I found the above responses quite humorous, it also made me question what it is about the Truth that makes it so difficult to tell. Do we purposely give children false answers because we get a kick out of knowing they'll believe every word we say? Is it that we ourselves aren't sure what the real answer is? Or could it be that we don't find the Truth to be as interesting as the answers we make up? Whatever the case may be, I can't help but think of the words found in John 8:32:

"Then you will know the Truth and the Truth will set you free."

Perhaps the reason I so deeply consider this subject is because I have always been a Truth-seeker. It makes me smile as I recall the times as a child when I would ask my parents "why?" after every question they would answer. By the time I got to the eleventh "why?" my parents would say, "You're just playing games. Go outside and play." Every time they would say this I would end up walking away frustrated and confused. I longed to know the true answers to my questions. It hurt me to think that my parents were keeping the answers from me when I wanted desperately to know the Truth.

I recently received an e-mail from a Christian teenage boy who asked me and three other women what our opinion was on girls wearing bikinis. Were we for or against them? Do we think it's wrong or do we think it's not a big deal? My heart went out to the boy as the three women proceeded to tease him about the way he worded his question, the fact that he wasn't knowledgable about different styles of swimsuits, and the fact that he was letting the question bother him in the first place. My heart broke as he told the women that he was now embarrassed that he asked. The Lord burdened my heart to write him a private e-mail sharing with him what the Word of God says about the topic and to tell him that I wish more people would seek the Truth like he does. The words of my e-mail were Spirit-filled and full of Scripture. The boy responded to my e-mail by telling me that this was exactly the answer he was looking for and thanked me profusely for sharing it with him.

I don't tell you this story to elevate myself, for the words were the Lord's alone. I share this with you so that you may consider the importance of questions and the value of the Truth. How I pray that we make the choice, from this day forward, to adopt a Biblical worldview and to hold to the wisdom found in Scripture, even when it's inconvenient. Who has ever made a difference by doing what was easy or convenient? It's those who dare to start brushfires in the minds of others that will find that the only thing left standing in the end is the Truth.

May we cherish every time someone asks us "why?" and may we also come to realize that every answer we give may determine whether someone walks in the darkness of the world or the light of God's Truth.

"Keep asking, and it will be given to you. Keep searching, and you will find. Keep knocking, and the door will be opened for you."

~ Matthew 7:7

Kansas City Teaser

There's rarely a good excuse for taking so long to write a new post, but if I tell you that I've been visiting family out of state does that count? I could probably get away with that one as long as I don't tell you that the place I stayed had 4 computers with internet access. Oops. :P

I'm going to keep this teaser short and sweet... a first for me!

Chris and I had an absolutely tremendous time with my family this past weekend. The response we received was beyond our deepest prayers. The blessings have been endless and I can't wait to share with you in person exactly what happened and what was said!

My oldest sister Heather received a really nice camera for Christmas last year and asked if she could take some photos of Chris and me. We went all over Kansas City and enjoyed the many locations. The only downside was that it was VERY windy that day, so I look a bit "wind blown" in my pictures. Oh well! She took hundreds of pictures of us, so it will take a while before she can get them uploaded. In the mean time, I have two pictures to tide you over! More to come, along with many more details about the trip!

"God reserves the very best for those who leave the choice to Him."

Remember When We Danced

Some of you have asked me how I came up with the name for my blog. What is it referring to and who is it that I long to remember dancing with?

It was nearly 4 years ago that I decided to live a life in abadon of the world. To grab hold of the One who holds my heart in the palm of His hand and allow myself to be swept up in His love. I remember those days as if it were yesterday. The emotions I felt then are still with me now. It was a feeling of freedom, of complete surrender. The world's promises always came up void and I longed to know imtimately what true love really was.


It's funny to look back on my earlier days of Salvation and see how the Lord was shaping me and refining me even back then. Each step I took would serve a higher purpose in the days to come. Little did I know that each experience, each trial and persecution I faced, each tear that fell from the face of a broken child, would bring me one step closer to the Truth that sets me free today.


When I moved back to California in January of last year I made the choice to put all distractions aside and spend a year focusing on my walk with the Lord. Each night after work I would spend an hour sitting on the cliffs overlooking the ocean and just talk to God. I would share my hopes, my dreams, my passions and ambitions, my biggest fears and my greatest disappointments. It was in those moments, when I allowed my heart to be caught up in the presence of God, that I found myself falling in love with Him all over again. I remember the moments when my human heart could not contain the love I felt for Him. I was convinced that it would burst at any moment. Lord, I could not possibly love you more than I do right now. But, day after day, as I found my love for the Lord increasing, I found my love for others growing as well. I finally understood what it was like to see the world through the Lord's eyes and not the imperfection of my own.

I pondered many things in my heart during those quiet times with the Lord. Witnessing firsthand the beauty of His creation, the tenderness of His touch, and the intimacy of time spent in His presence, I found myself speechless. How could the God who spoke creation into being be so interested in me? I felt so undeserving of His love.


One of my daily prayers as I sat upon the cliffs was for the Lord to tell my future husband that I love him and that I can't wait until we have our first dance as husband and wife. As time passed, I found myself more and more distracted with thoughts of what he would be like and when I would meet him. One day, while thinking of him as I watched the waves crash upon the shore, tears of sorrow began to fill my eyes. I realized that I had spent so much of my day thinking and imagining my future husband when I already had the most perfect groom. I am the bride of Christ. My groom showed me the greatest love on Earth by giving up His life in order to save mine. Who forgets their first and truest love? I am so sorry, Lord. How could I have forgotten? Oh how I wept.

In the humble moments that followed my weeping, I felt the Lord lifting my head. "Come down to the water, My Darling" He whispered, "I have something for you." As I picked myself up and walked to the place where the waves meet the sand, I felt the Spirit in me stop. What is it, Jesus? What do You have for me? My eyes looked down at the sand as my eyes fell on a single purple flower resting beside my feet. As I picked up the precious flower and held it close to my heart, I looked up to the heavens. At that moment I felt the tender voice of my groom whispering, "I love you, Kelley. Will you dance with me?"


As I write these words to you, dear friends, I am so overcome that I don't feel as if I can continue writing. And so I will leave you with the words that I wrote to my groom the morning after we danced together by the sea with a purple flower in my hand.

"REMEMBER WHEN WE DANCED"

Good morning, O True Love of Mine
I dreamt of You last night
You carried me away with You
I never left Your sight

You brought me to a secret place
And smiled when I drew close
Your eyes were filled with tenderness
With every word I spoke

You took my hand and led me forth
Onto a blessed hill
That overlooked a sparkling sea
Of golden stars was filled

Though beautiful the sight had been
A glace You never took
Your eyes were fixed on me
And so I asked, "Why don't You look?"

"My Precious Love," You said to me,
"How can I watch the sea
When what's most beautiful of all
Is standing next to me?"

As tears began to fill my eyes
You gently kissed my hand
And asked me with a tender voice
If I would like to dance

The hours seemed like minutes
While we danced beneath the sky

As raindrops falling down from Heaven
Never let us dry

And when the choir of angels singing
Sang their final song
You whispered in my ear,
"How I've loved you for so long!

From the moment that My Father made you
I prayed that you'd be Mine
And I gave My life in hopes one day
Eternal Life you'd find

And when I heard you call My name
Some sixteen years ago
And say that you had chosen Me
And wanted Me to know...

I thought I'd died and gone to Heaven
For a second time
I fell down at My Father's feet
With tears of joy I cried

You see, I've waited all My life
To finally have the chance
To stand beside the one I love
And ask her for this dance

And now that you have finally come
I can't believe my eyes
For you are far more beautiful
Than I ever realized

And I can't wait until
You'll be forever by My side
And we'll walk the streets My Father built
And you will be My bride

But until then, My Precious One
If you should get a chance
Whenever you see raindrops
Please remember when we danced

And know that I will come for you
Though you will not know when
I promise you, my Dearest Love,
That we will dance again."

My Precious Lord, my Truest Love,
I have no words to say
And so I simply pray for rain
And wait until that day.

---------------------------

by Kelley Downing

12/06/2008

The Heart of Worship

As many of you know, I led worship for a women's retreat last weekend. I was so excited for it to come and had been preparing months in advance. Don't you love it when you learn more than you ever anticipated? The theme of the lesson was "Satan's Lies vs. God's Truth". Oh how I needed this lesson! The Truth Project study I've been doing has been so transforming in that department and I was excited to get to solidify my learnings.

I arrived at the retreat on Friday, sang, played the guitar, and led worship. Then the teaching began. The message was so profound and hit me so hard that I knew I needed to spend some time alone with God that night in the Word and prayer. So I read the Word, I prayed, and I journaled.

These were the words of prayer that I wrote to the Lord that night...


"You say You search me and You know me, God, so search me through and through. Do You find me to be contaminated? Are you offended by what You see? All I wanted was to be beautiful, Lord... completely and uniquely set apart. It seems, however, that I have turned out just like everybody else... in search of significance in a place I'll never find it.

If there's one thing I've learned it's that the world, the 'all knowing' world doesn't know a thing. They walk around thinking that they hold the answer to every question and the Truth to every thought... but the world is a liar... and I have believed them.

I long to know the Truth, the whole Truth, and nothing but the Truth. Living a lie is to be truly and completely held captive. Lies imprison our hearts and convince us that we are what the world says we are... that we will only ever be that which they declare us to be. I'm done with living a lie, Lord. How I long to be set free from every worldly chain I carry. I want freedom, Lord, and I'm ready to give up everything for it.

'Then you will know the Truth and the Truth will set you free!' - John 8:32"


The Question

Prayer is a spiritual gift of mine and Lord has faithfully answered each of them. When I prayed that I was willing to give up everything in order to be freed of my worldly chains, I meant it... and I knew that He would answer that prayer in a difficult but necessary way. Be careful what you pray for, Kelley.





When I woke up the next morning (Saturday) I pulled out my guitar to practice worship for that day and I immediately stopped. My voice was gone. My speaking voice was strained and my singing voice had almost disappeared completely. By the time Sunday morning rolled around the only sound coming from my mouth was complete silence. I could not sing and I couldn't speak at all. Not a word. I was so frustrated. I couldn't believe it all was gone... though, deep down, I really was not surprised. I just didn't understand... I was there to serve and to lead these women in worship. The Lord gave me the gift of song and of music. How can I lead if I have no voice, God?


The Truth

The Lord taught me a very important lesson that Sunday morning. You see, we Believers often have the false impression that spiritual gifts cannot be used for our own glory. Because "spiritual gifts" are esteemed over plain old talent, we assume that our motives are always pure and true when we are using them. The Truth is... when all is said and done, spiritual gifts are used to bless us, bless the Lord, and bless others... but they don't make us who we are or determine our value in the Lord's eyes. He loves us because He chooses to... not because we did anything or could ever do anything to earn His love.

The message of the weekend, based on the book The Search For Significance, was not to base our self-worth on things, or people, or abilities. While I didn't understand at first why the Lord would take away the gift of leading in music, which was the main reason I was there in the first place, He made it clear to me that morning...

"When the music fades and all is stripped away... I simply come."

The heart of worship is not about music or singing, it's a state of surrendering the lies of our hearts in exchange for the Truth that's found in God's presence. You see, I had mistakenly believed that my worship was inferior if my voice could not be heard with human ears. How wrong I was. Worship is an act of the heart, not an act of our voice. Tears filled my eyes as the Lord whispered to my heart, "Precious Child, even if your body fails you, your talents give way, and your spiritual gifts are nowhere to be found... I still love you."



The Truth Will Set You Free

When the retreat finally came to a close that Sunday morning and all the equipment was put away, I made one final trip to my room to grab my bags and my guitar and bring them to the car. As I descended the stairs I had one of my favorite worship songs playing over and over in my head. Out of habit I opened my mouth to sing...

"There's a cry in my heart for Your glory to fall

For Your presence to fill up my senses..."

My eyes quickly filled with tears as I heard my voice sing clearly first the first time in 2 days. He gad given me my voice back as if it had never left me. Now that I knew the Truth, my voice had finally been freed to worship Him with a true heart of worship. For I finally believed these precious words in my heart...

I am deeply loved

I am completely forgiven

I am fully pleasing

I am totally accepted...

... and...

...COMPLETE IN CHRIST.

I will never forget that moment as long as I live.

Something Old, Something New

Do you ever have days when you feel just plain sentimental? I sure do. In fact, today's my lucky day! Taking a stroll down memory lane, even if it wasn't THAT long ago, always leaves me feeling nostalgic. These moments are bittersweet, but I am choosing to embrace them today.


Flipping through pictures from a couple of years ago, I found photos of my family at my sister Sarah's wedding. I smile whenever I see them. It seems so long ago to me.



I love this first picture. Even though we are all wearing beautiful dresses and holding flowers, it still reminds me of being on a rollercoaster.








Even girls with big mouths can show their softer side...








Who can reach the finish line first? I would have won for sure if Kevin hadn't pushed me out of the way. The little cheater!





Giving my Maid of Honor speech... I don't remember exactly what I said, but apparently it was pretty funny!





And the best part of all... I caught the bouquet! According to tradition, that means that I'll be the next one to get married. :)




Something New


How humbling and encouraging to receive a very special award from two very beautiful Proverbs 31 wives...

What I especially love about this award is the meaning behind it:

"These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated."

Veronica and Natalie... thank you so much for the sweet words and encouragement! Our desire is to do all things "As unto the Lord" (Colossians 3:23) and I love that our blogs are no different!


I only have 4 friends here on Blogspot, so that makes giving out the award very easy... EVERYONE GETS ONE! :)


And the Award Goes To...

#1. Veronica over at Luv My Arrows. From the very first moment I met Veronica I felt as though I had known her for years. Our mutual love for the Lord, children, and the White family made us instant sisters at heart and in spirit. My favorite thing about her is that she is one of the most genuinely kind and beautiful women I have ever met. If you want evidence of her dedication to the Lord, you need not look further than her family. "Her children call her blessed and her husband praises her." I love her dearly and always look forward to reading the treasured moments she shares with us on her blog! This woman is the epitome of what it means to be truly beautiful on the inside and out.

#2. Natalie over at Raising Miracles. I remember the first time I met Natalie in person. She and Dan were waiting at a restaurant for me and Chris to meet them for dinner. Anyone who knows Natalie knows that she has the most beautiful and welcoming smile. After talking for a little bit, our table was finally ready. Natalie went to visit the Girl's Room while the rest of us sat down. At this point I could barely hold it in and the moment Natalie was out of sight I blurted out to Dan, "Oh my goodness! Your wife is absolutely stunning!" I went on and on about her to Chris on the drive back. What a tender spirit and a beautiful face! No wonder her sweet family is so in love with her! This woman is an absolute gem and her strength and courage, which are so evident if you've ever had the pleasure of reading her blog, is an absolute inspiration to me.

#3. Christopher over at Rancho Del Rey Church Salt N Light Ministry. In spite of the fact that this Godly man is the love of my life, his blog is a blessing through and through. Although I'll admit that one of the first things I noticed about Chris was how handsome he is, I really fell in love with him when I saw his dedication to ministry. With a love of politics myself, I was eager to know a man so dedicated to a ministry that is so unpopular yet crucial. I know that anyone who passionately led a ministry revolving around "Politics and Religion" had to either be completely crazy about the Lord or a glutton for punishment. Chris' dedication to the Lord is an inspiration to me every day. I can say with complete honesty that he is my hero. I didn't think that a man who is both a warrior and so tender existed anymore... a King David... a man after God's own heart. Please take the time to check out his ministry blog... there is no doubt in my mind that he will bless your heart as much as he has mine.

#4. JM over at The Grewe Crew. I love this woman! If there was a separate award for Hospitality JM would win it hands down! Her loving heart opens her home to fellow Believers and unbelivers with such joy! If you spend even 5 minutes with The Grewe Crew you will learn something... many things... things of worth. I cherish the conversations and the laughter I have shared with her and in her home. The Lord has His loving hands in her life in such a huge way. It's a comfort to look at her and realize that women can be strong and tender all at the same time. I cherish this woman more than words can say and I thank the Lord daily for the example that she is to her fellow sisters. Read her blog if you want to see the adorable daughter that she is raising up in the Lord! You will see that her beauty was inherited from her wonderful mommy.

You are a treasure, dear friends. I love you very much.